Hi folks, I hope you are well. I’ve had a day’s teaching and I want to wrap up before I head home. It’s such a sensitive subject I think money in particular the United Kingdom.
Those of you that have been to any of the events that I’ve done on personal development you know, there’s a whole section on this.
You might have aspirations to do more with your finances but your belief system is wired differently in other words, even though you have an intention to do something for some reason you keep hitting a wall, you keep repeating the same pattern.
Or you get into arguments or your relationship with money and what you attract and how you attract and how you keep it and how you lose it seems to keep going again, again, again.
That is fundamentally due to your own wired template.
I’ve called it a template because of my background in engineering. The reality is inside the six inches between here and here you will definitely have a set of rules and beliefs and values associated with money.
Now there are a couple of quick wins to get you to understand that, if you’re a parent watching this or you’ve got friends who are a parent to kids please encourage them to watch this. I’m choosing this time to talk about it because I think money or lack of it, or fear of losing jobs or fear of income being reduced whatever customers dropping off the cliff is growing at the moment and nobody knows where we are going with this.
The fact is that if your mindset is not set for this next new course that we’re going on and your children witness that you are going to leave an indelible mark on their minds. And if you don’t believe it, come and spend three days with me on a turning point event but we haven’t run one for three and half years now. When I used to run, it was a huge subject.
Whatever you learn in this first five, six years on this earth your children become like sponges.
They model your behaviour. They model your relationship with money. They model your language, your beliefs become their beliefs. If you’ve got fear, anger. If you’ve got frustration. If you’ve lost money, or you don’t talk about it or you argue about it or whatever is, you will literally, leave that imprint in your children’s minds and my question is do you want to do that?
If you don’t have kids, you were a child at one point, your parents would have made a massive difference to your beliefs. They would’ve basically built your initial belief system around money.
So, one of the quick wins for you is to look at three things.
What did you see? What did you observe when you were growing up about money? In other words, did you see your uncle, your aunties, did you see relatives, did you see your guardian or your parents if your parents were alive and together? Or did they split up, divorce, did you see arguments about money? Was money a conversation that happened a lot?
Did you find yourself noticing them having disputes about it or was there abundance? Was there a good mindset, healthy mind, healthy relationship? Was it a lack or abundance? Did they talk about opportunities they were pursuing? Were they passionate? Did they come home, dredged and tired, knackered from working?
The key thing is whatever you saw would have left an imprint on your brain. And because you’re so young and we’re all pliable, but the younger you are, you’re a blank canvas. So if you saw them happy and jolly and positive, engaged, creating ideas, developing businesses going off and making money and sometimes having some challenges, but talking about it in a positive way, then you most likely have a very healthy relationship with money.
But if you hear arguments, fallout, I meet people who say I’m not going into business because I saw my parents fail.
You are not your parents, you’re not a sum of your parents or the observation of your parents and the part of whoever it was around you. That’s the first thing, you have to think about redefining your beliefs. What did you hear? Money doesn’t grow on trees.
Only rich people can afford those things. Money is the root of all evil. It is a classic misquote. It’s wrong. It is actually a biblical quote, which is I think the love of money is the root of all evil, meaning the obsession for money.
My question to you is, what did you hear? Did your parents say leave the room we are discussing it, this has nothing to do with you, or you can’t afford that?
If you hear constantly that it becomes your belief system so when you go out and get older, it’s like I’d like to have that but I can’t afford it.
It is a default belief that we retire to revert back to. What you see and what you hear, literally transforms who you are.
Ultimately, then, there’s the whole thing of what did you experience on top of what you saw, did you then experience something that knocked you out? Did you have a bad experience when you tried something and you lost money?
Did you have experience where you tried something with your parents, and it didn’t work? What have you experienced? Have you experienced great things and you’ve had good opportunities to work for you.
A great friend of mine is an amazing trader. He lost 75K when he started to trade the markets, lost the whole lot and yet he came back and he chose to learn to do it properly and he now teaches trading. He’s a very successful trader and has his own funds.
Everybody has things happen to them, but it’s how you reacted to it.
What was your experience of that thing with money and how did it shape your beliefs because what you’re going to have to do over the coming weeks and months, is you may need to redefine your beliefs around money and what Covid and the recession means to you.
If you’ve learnt in the past it’s a bad thing to be in a recession and there’s no opportunity buckle down, shrink and say and just don’t spend, that’s very different to somebody like Richard Branson, who talks about expanding out of recession and finding a way to grow through it instead of shrinking down.
Two very different things.
You are simply some of your beliefs that existed from the past, but if we draw a line today at 18:00 hours on Friday the 18 September, what if you drew a line and said I am going to redefine a new set of beliefs and I’m going to approach this differently.
In the past the beliefs haven’t worked for me. I need to redefine my beliefs and start differently.
Dr Ro signing out.
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